i don’t know if i could love him he’s been a good fuck
a perfect gardener of stars a tiller of dust i think he knows darkness & don’t mind me opening to him an apocalypse of light i keep coming back he knows his way around velvet & softness an inheritance i’ve tempered as silence an impressement
of how i always want to say hold me kiss me but settle for
falling glitter in my eyes i’m small for him two parts conquerable
one part dangerous that ethereal thing he wants to tell somebody he discovered knowing a new myth won’t keep him
alive i need a long hard fuck tonight & if this can’t be something between us promise me you want treat your heart like a brigade of bees how you want me to be a poem a language you only understand after you’ve cum
after you’ve learned
decay is the same as me thinking goddamn & yes i just may be all for you
J'SUN HOWARD is a dancemaker and poet living in Chicago, IL. He is one of the inaugural Co-MISSION Fellows at Links Hall and a 2017 3Arts Make a Wave grantee. His poems are forthcoming in GIANTHOLGOY and have appeared in Propter Nos, The Body Manifold, Bird's Thumb, 3rd Language, Calamus Journal, Inkwell, and Garland Court Review.